Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Lionel Richie

I'm glad he doesn't want the real one, because I'd have to kick his ass. The real one is mine. Someone has it somewhere. Maybe Lionel himself. And I want it. Lionel, if you're reading this, how much do you want for it? Or maybe, since you're loaded and I'm not, you'll just give it to me? Think about it and call me.

best of craigslist > chicago >

Ceramic bald Lionel Richie bust wanted

Date: 2010-02-01, 9:40AM CST

I am looking for a replica of the bust made in the Lionel Richie "Hello" video.

However I'd like it to be bald as I intend to recreate that lovable afromullet with some sort of cream cheese dip at parties. Not that I have many parties, but if I had this, I might start.

I'd like it to be maybe about a foot tall.

It really has to look like that bust (which oddly enough doesn't look like Lionel Richie at all) or it won't be worth it. Hopefully it can be the same orangish-brown matte finish that is in the video but I understand making it safe for a cheesy-afro might lead to some compromises.

Please email me with a bid including a breakdown the cost of supplies and labor. I can also exchange for computer repair (mac/pc, virus/malware repair, etc) or maybe a 12" G4 iBook,

Thank you to Curtis for informing me that terracotta would not be a good choice for a food-safe sculpture.

Take care.

Fugly Prom Dresses Of The Day

I don't know jack about dresses, so I'll take the word of Voronya and Brooke, who sent these. Pics via The Fashion Police, among others.

I bet they sold a lot of these after 9/11

It's on backwards, right?

Needs more ruffles!

Looks like she lost a shit-slinging contest. Stupid girl -- the monkeys always win.

Prom dress: $135
Date for the night: $500 (extra for "full service")

The cougar special

Have you ever felt sorry for a piece of fabric?

They couldn't get anyone to model this one. Not surprising.

At midnight, a baby pops out.

Somewhere, Linda Evans is looking for her favorite dress.

This next batch are entries in a duct-tape prom contest. See more here. Link from Brooke.

They're in the marching band. How do I know? I just do.

He drives a tractor to school.

For a good time, put your "key" in her "heart."

Music Vids Of The Day: Jesus

The now-classic original. Beth wanted to see it again on LOTD, and I'm nothing if not accomodating.

The remake: Satan Is My Friend

The Donk remix

January Mugshot Roundup

Bless their hearts.

Heh heh heh heh I won't be ignored, Dan heh heh heh

Got shirt? For when that one rots right off you, which should be anytime now.

FAQs are supposed to be helpful. That's not very helpful.

"Y'all got any nachos up in here?"

Drill here

" need to run, I couldn't catch you anyway."

If that's Bieber, keep him there and throw away the key

Nice hair, Limahl. Must be a Neverending blow-dry session every day.

Tonight on TLC, "Big Jail, Little Bitch."

cnt tyyype turnd 2 sto^n e

"Why isn't Aunt Diane here? It's Christmas."
"She got detained."

Hey! Who told you to stop sucking?!

Walter Matthau's test shot for Some Like It Hot. Not surprisingly, the role went to Lemmon instead.

I didn't know Stevie Wonder was doing hair now.

Don't look at me, I'm hideous!

E.T. phone (the nursing) home!

Whaddya mean the Solid Gold auditions aren't today?

More like "Missing" and "Link"

Ooooo weeee just wait muthafuckas cuz when I get outta here Imma FUCK SOMEBODY UP


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